elegant sentiment

http://www.flickr.com/photos/rebelwithafrog/5828278565/

bedew, elegant sentiment.

drooping into nightness, wherefore vigor and freshness spent in task.
become somnolent. coolness, darkness, all but shade and blades of grass;
sustaining the white noise of night i am absorbing all quiet.

doth fully still; my soul pulsates, my breath confesses desire.

and heavenly dew finds me, my jaded nooks and tattered cranies
patient dew, quench my folly, douse my sullied conscious, settle thee
i accept thy lingering bath, saturated and washed of haste.

elegant sentiment, refreshed.


Author's Note:
I spent so many years wallowing in discomfort. A struggle at times to feel normal, and writing about it. Seemingly to always be looking back at the pain. Even when looking forward to something in the future. I know discomfort awaits; i know when and where. Some time ago I started concentrating on wallowing in relaxation. Striving for the situation to harmony. How does one get there? You don’t. You are just there, like the dew. Dew just is. When all conditions are right, dew will collect on everything outside. I can’t demand peace of mind, freedom from discomfort or absence of want. I can however, get outside of my head and prepare myself mentally to allow for dew and a peace of mind to enter. This elegant sentiment is an exercise in that preparation.


I shall share this poem with acquaintances and strangers. I shall read the poem out loud. I shall ask them to walk across the dew in the morning without haste.

carnations

http://www.flickr.com/photos/rebelwithafrog/4036488614/

of miles past
bud vase resting
in a dash
flowers cut fresh
funerals accepted
white and blue
different colors
different days
different people
same outcome
rememberance
as i drive

Good Grief

Good Grief 6-3-91 / 11:30pm

It's amazing that in such
a rushing violent death
I can see an inner peace.
That horrible beauty,
rushing violent death,
and to accept it.
His rushing violent death.
My beautiful brother.

Grief brought my pen to paper. It was my first tool in dealing with the loss of my brother. Yes, this blog started out heavy on the death side. That is how I got started. This is not the end either. Grief doesn't go away, it just gets different with time. A couple of hours after deciding to accept his death, I understood what it meant to acknowledge the beauty of his life, despite the brutal truth.

The Last Paradox

The Last Paradox 6-3-91 / 7:00pm

Onwards inside death
lay a euphoric tranquility.
Past the last synapse
of pain and fear,
parallel to reality.
To live that moment.
To die that moment.
Whilst overlapping states
of body and spirit
dissolve to their own:
So this is what it's like to die.
How pleasant.
And the art of dying is accepted
as the act of living is
before the birth of death.

Note: After years of struggling with the violent death of my brother and acceptance of that death in the same sentence I started to look for something positive, something peaceful. He deserves better than that, I deserve better than that.

This Understanding About Death

This Understanding About Death 1-17-92

It's just a part of life
and for me to be afraid of death,
to ignore death or to hide death
would have that part of my life confined
unable to grow spiritually.
That would take away from me
the freedom to live life
to its full potential.
Writing about death
exposes my feelings,
my thoughts an my fears about death
of the people around me
and within myself.
In doing that I can find
an acceptance of death
and I am able to live with death freely
no matter how morbid it may seem.